Tornado Demands 'North Potomac' Designation

Attorneys representing the tornado that tore across a 26-mile swath from Poolesville to Derwood last week are demanding the National Weather Service stop referring to their client as the “Central Montgomery County Tornado,” and instead identify them as the “North Potomac Twister.”

"Our client identifies as North Potomac, just like the Toll Brothers signs read where they crossed over from Loudoun," the tornado's lawyers said from the steps of the Montgomery County Circuit Court in North Bethesda, after filing an emergency petition.

Local media initially dubbed the twister the Poolesville Tornado or Gaithersburg Tornado, but NWS changed the moniker to Central Montgomery County Tornado as the extent of damage became clear.

"County zoning rules favoring exclusivity and ambiguity clearly prevail," lead attorney Henry Gale of the North Garrett Park firm Gale, Bluster & Nguyend said at a press conference from his office overlooking Montrose Road and Rt 355.

“People are talking about storm damage, but what about emotional damage?” asked Gale, who called on local media to refer to their client by their preferred pronouns they/their/ twister. "Our client prefers twister over tornado because, you know, 'nads'." Gale told reporters.

North Potomac usurped Silver Spring as the second largest unincorporated census-designated area in Montgomery County in 2014. Only North Chevy Chase, extending from Somerset to Aspen Hill, is larger.

National Weather Service officials declined to comment due to the pending litigation.