Spotted Lanternflies: Don’t Squish, Sauté
For the last few years, environmentalists and public officials have urged Montgomery County residents to stomp, squash, and smite the invasive spotted lanternfly on sight. But all that has changed thanks to a surprising discovery out of Germantown: they’re absolutely delicious.
"It started as a joke," says Chef Gregory Webb of the upscale Upcounty bistro Laperaux. “We were doing a zero-waste foraging dinner, and the sous chef dared me to pan-sear one. I added a garlic foam and a fennel reduction—suddenly, people were asking for seconds.”
Arame Seaweed Lanternfly Salad with Tahini Orange Dressing
Webb’s signature “Lanternfly Carpaccio” has since gone viral on TikTok, sparking a Mid-Atlantic culinary craze. Where once people posted triumphant videos of lanternflies’ last moments under a sneaker, now food influencers are seen delicately pinching them with tweezers, whispering “tree to table.”
Jumping into the mix, Montgomery County is rebranding the lanternfly as sustainable free-range sky veal packed with protein, antioxidants, and "an intoxicating citrus finish that pairs well with late harvest Rieslings from our local vineyards," according to Visit Montgomery.
"If you can’t beat ’em, eat ’em,” County Executive Marc Elrich declared, holding up a lanternfly tempura roll at Kin Da Thai in Takoma Park. “And it’s keto!”
The lanternfly joins a growing list of invasive species being reimagined as dinner rather than disaster. Maryland chefs have already embraced the northern snakehead—a voracious invasive fish once labeled a biological nightmare—by turning it into ceviche, tacos, and even deep-fried street food at local festivals. “It’s the same philosophy,” says Webb. “We can either waste energy fighting nature, or fire up the grill and eat our way out of the problem.”
So the next time you spot that telltale polka-dotted wing, think twice. Don’t squish—sauté. Your palate—and the planet—will thank you.
————————————
WARNING:
Possible Side Effects of Spotted Lanternfly™ (lycorma delicatula) Ingestion
IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION
Spotted Lanternfly™ is not for everyone. Before consuming, speak with your doctor if you’ve ever experienced bleeding gums after flossing, ingrown pubic hair, or if your scalp sweats after eating jalapenos.
COMMON SIDE EFFECTS
- Drowsiness
- Nausea
- Rectal Echo Syndrome
- Tongue Moulting
- Explosive Earwax Ejection
- Anogenital Barking
Spotted Lanternfly™ should not be consumed with grapefruit, inner guilt, or during lunar eclipses. Do not operate heavy machinery or engage in small talk with PETA members while eating Spotted Lanternfly™.
Ask your doctor if Spotted Lanternfly™ is right for you!
